Eight two be a fan? Hardly, it's as good as Six!

Six months ago was the time when the idea was first hatched; go to Europe during their Winter, and have one last crack at a holiday overseas before life and all its commitments contrive to keep me well occupied and well happy at home. It was something I always wanted, and was even encouraged by the management, to do. I had a grin from ear to ear. Sure it would cost a bit, but I'd never been in the financial position to make this kind of pilgrimage before. It is going to be fun.

Yet the main attraction, the big ticket on the bill has lost some of its lustre, and I'm not sure that it had to be that way.

Of course, I'm talking about football. But then, I have a healthy dichotomy of readers when it comes to football and both sets of fans may take exception to me calling either game just that. So to make it plain for those who love only one or the other I'll refer to them as "AFL", or Aussie Rules Football, and "EPL", English Premier League Football.

I'm not here this evening to generate an opinion piece, you will find plenty of those surrounding the troubles that are circling the Arsenal Football Club elsewhere at the moment. What I wish to do is to further explain to my AFL audience what a true free agency could mean to them, and to my EPL audience, show that I don't got much time for money, 'cause money can't buy me love.

Last week I suggested what may happen in the Free Agency world of the AFL. I tried my best to suggest that our loyalties as fans will be tested to the utmost as players we grow to love will jump ship at the first opportunity of greater earning power or potential for success. It will upset many, but it won't be a blip on the madness that is the multi-billion dollar world of the EPL. To demonstrate such madness, I'll use the AFL's most recent powerhouse side, Geelong FC, as my model for how the world at an EPL club can change in just six months (Disclaimer: This hypothetical is the stuff of pure AFL fantasy and in no way reflects what I believe could possibly happen to the Geelong Football Club. They've been the model club on and off the field for almost six years now and I don't see that, nor their playing list, changing. We cool Cats fans? Yeah, we cool).

You see, the Cats (Geelong) have just failed at the final hurdle again. They've lost to the biggest, most popular, and now best club in the league, Collingwood FC, in the battle for the Premiership. As Geelong are an ageing side with many players choosing to retire at season's end, Geelong's opportunity for future success is limited, and although the retirements have given them much money to spend under the salary cap, the club is not an attractive place to come to as of now. They will have to rely on youth to rebuild them to the lofty heights they once reached (sound familiar EPL fans?).

Their star midfielder is Joel Selwood, a hard tackling, fiercely competitive, outstanding user of the ball by foot and is one who contributes the odd goal. He is slated for Free Agency. He is offered an enormous salary by Geelong, but decides he wants to play for the most rejuvinated club in the competition, the West Coast Eagles. His older and younger brother whom he loves dearly both play there. Western Australia has the most beautiful winter weather in the country. The club has won a premiership as recently as 2006 and are on the precipice again. He signs for less money to play with them. Geelong are weakened further.

Another player of the age and experience level that Geelong would like to keep is Travis Varcoe. He was taken at the not unsubstantial cost of a first round draft pick, and so highly thought of was he that he was given the guernsey number 5 worn by club legends such as Polly Farmer and most famously, Gary Ablett Senior. He has precocious talents, terrorising opposition defenders when he has the ball, and capable of creating a goal for himself or his teammates out of nothing. He has yet to reach a level of consistency from game to game that will set him apart as a champion. Geelong are confident this will happen given time but offer him a contract reflective of where they see his talents and development  now. Instead, he is courted by champions Collingwood with contract negotiations only scuppered when the new challengers in town, Hawthorn FC, throw a contract at him that is simply too good to refuse. Hawthorn now have an attack with a talent level that is the envy of every club in the competition; the goals will be flying in from everywhere with opposing defences being able to do scant little to stop it. Geelong must seek adequate replacements and fast.

But as they are beaten to the signings of new players one by one, and are snubbed by other players who see them as a faded force, Geelong enter the new season to one of the most embarrassing defeats in their long and proud history; how was this allowed to happen? Especially after the AFL extended the "Trade Week" and Free Agency periods right until the beginning of the season. No sporting club in their right mind the world over would allow this to happen. Would they?

Welcome to The Arsenal Football Club, the EPL team I love and am practically making the pilgrimage to Mecca for. The team that have lost two of their best, and were before that time, two of my favourite players. Although in the EPL world "lost" can be a misnomer; these players were sold for a net profit of nearly 60 million British pounds. That's not a misprint, it is what it is. Sixty. Million. Pounds. Nearly One hundred million Australian dollars.

For the AFL's Joel Selwood, the appropriate EPL analogy is Francesco "Cesc" Fabregas; Arsenal's captain and one of the greatest players in the world. For Travis Varcoe read Samir Nasri, a precocious French attacking talent who, whilst wearing the number 8 of club legends Frederik Ljungberg and the great Ian Wright, was just beginning to come into his own. Both gone due to the ineptitude of the men responsible for the management of contracts at the Arsenal Football Club, both vitally important to the success of the club, both using their not inconsiderable talents elsewhere in the prime of their careers. Six months ago I thought I was coming to watch these little magicians play and I was as excited as a little kid. Now I don't know who I'll be watching play other than that they'll wear red with white sleeves.

The real crime of the Arsenal Football Club is not for debate however. It is not the sale of these players; both wanted to leave for differing reasons and once that happens there is scant little you can do to stop it. There is a modality, however, to rectify such problems. Unlike the world of the AFL where players are traded, drafted, or as I have predicted, will soon be able to sign free agent contracts, Arsenal are allowed to buy players from other clubs to replace the ones who have departed, much like how they sold Fabregas and Nasri. And yet they have chosen not to.

I could likely accept this if the remaining players in the squad were of similar standard and quality. But nearly every Arsenal supporter, even if they disagreed exactly whether it was the manager (in AFL parlance, coach), board or owner who was to blame for not re-investing that money, nearly every supporter agreed on one thing; the remaining players were not good enough to compete for the championship. We didn't have to wait long to find out either. The only time in Arsenal's history that they have conceded eight goals in a game was in 1896. Well it was, until Sunday, against a club that used to be our nearest rivals, the Champions Manchester United. The scoreboard said it all, United 8, Arsenal 2. It didn't take long for the pun; wouldn't you eight two be an Arsenal supporter right now?

I don't hate to be an Arsenal supporter. I love my Arsenal, yes I do. An irrational love? Perhaps. I have explained my reasons as to why I do love them the first time I ever had an article posted on the web, an Arsenal FC Blog's guest post titled "How Arsenal have ensured Arsenal will host the World Cup in our Lifetime'" (Although with hindsight I may want that title back; isn't hindsight a wonderful thing?). And I'm still very, very excited about the prospect of attending a couple of home matches in North London at the magnificent Emirates stadium. There's just a tremendous amount of regret at the moment that I, like nearly every "Gooner" (Arsenal supporter) the world over, has seen their club decline; our one time stars shining elsewhere, their replacements playing for other clubs with the club unwilling or unable to pay the price to lure equally talented players to our club. Six months ago I was excited about Cesc and Nasri. Today I'm more excited about the prospect of seeing the Czech Republic and Germany.

All is not lost. As is my eccentric want, as is my taste for the romantic, Arsenal did go out and buy a player I've become a big fan of in a short period of time. This time last year, a young lad not yet out of his teenage years named Carl Jenkinson, sat in the stands of Arsenal's home ground to watch the club he loved play in a pre-season tournament called the Emirates Cup. He was a professional footballer plying his trade for Charlton Athletic, a team well below the quality of a Premier League club. Yet someone saw something special in young Carl and offered Charlton a million pounds for his services and a professional contract to play for Arsenal, the club he supported since childhood. His interview upon joining the club is quite remarkable, he is literally blinking back tears of disbelief that he has signed up to play not only for one of the biggest and best clubs in Europe, but one he has loved all his life. He's merely a wide defender and not a star striker, he's technically limited and he has a lot to learn about top level EPL football. This was evidenced in the 8-2 demolition in which his inexperience led to two poorly timed challenges that saw him receive two yellow cards and a sending off.

But he's one of us, a proper Gooner, and will never long for pastures greener nor take defeats as anything over than a heavy weight in his heart. It's for this reason, when I find myself at the Arsenal "Armoury" store I'll be buying myself a "Jenkinson" shirt even though there are far more star turns at the club. I'll get behind one of our own with nothing but my full support and will sing his name with gusto. After all, I'll let you AFL and EPL fans alike argue whether the song I've penned is a pun on a song written about Tony Lockett or Dennis Bergkamp...

"One Carl Jenkinson, There's only one Carl Jenkinson!"

And all is not yet lost, Arsenal still have but two days to spend on players before the so-called "transfer window" closes and have already signed a Brazilian international defender and are being heavily linked to Germany's champion central defender Per Mertesacker. Should he sign for Arsenal I may, just may, become a little more optimistic about this season. Maybe the club does care about the supporters. Maybe they do want to right the wrongs. Maybe they will spend again on an established attacking star. But you best get on with it lads, the time is ticking!

Of course, I can't help but leave you without an awful pun. You see, I'm glad there is only one Carl Jenkinson. After all, it's better than six!

Until next time guys,

Whitey

Dream Team Spirit (Trade Out Again...)

It's prelim finals time in Dream Team and Supercoach. That means that half the teams remain (four in the major finals, four in the minors) and that those fantasy fanatics are frantically working the waiver wire to organise the perfect trade to get them over the hump and into that one day in the first week of September.

It's a precarious course. Lost are the Carlton stars to the bye; those with Judd, Murphy and Gibbs would be most concerned indeed. They would be further troubled by the ever reliable Pav finally being any less than reliable, even if it is no fault of his own. As for Col Sylvia? You've further muddied the waters mate, tuck it all in, no elbows! What's that? You did? Oh.

Quite the dilemna for a great few and yet, I can't help but think there's an opportunity for me to prosper from this. Step aside Greg, there's a new Coodabeen in town and I plan on being the champion.

Disclaimer: I sing pretty average. And I'm not suggesting you should trade Jack Riewoldt for Mzungu; that horse has bolted. But hopefully you'll enjoy this little song about the dramas that face a "supercoach" every week as much as I enjoyed making it. I give you Radiohead's "Dream Team Spirit". May your ears not bleed too badly. :)

Cat's in the Cradle - Review

That was ugly. So I'm going to get this over with as painlessly as possible so you can all dance on the grave of our predictions.


**  Hawthorn, as predicted by many I've spoken to, defeated Carlton. But Carlton had a spirited fight-back in the second half and showed they'll mix it come September.


Pigshit they did. If people want to over-analyse this game as anything but Hawthorn putting them to the sword before deciding at half-time "we'll just do enough to win the game from here" then they may. The truth is if that were a final, Hawthorn don't let up and win by ten goals or more. They manhandled Carlton's midfielders and were too tall in the key positions. There's a reason Hawthorn haven't lost to these blokes since '07; it was obvious Friday night. Don't over-analyse it.


**  Which is exactly what I did with Melbourne. Passion can take you only so far in footy if you don't have the quality. This Demons team brushed Richmond aside with ease barely six weeks ago. It's a Richmond side that recently lost to the Gold Coast. Things are very wrong at Melbourne and the supporter discontent is palpable. They were supposed to kick on from a terrific improvement last season. The truth is their list has been exposed as soft and not nearly good enough. Would you stay if you were Tom Scully? I got this one wrong badly; I over-analysed it. Disclaimer: this prediction was my doing and Pete wanted no part of it. Always listen to your father!


**  Well, perhaps I was right that Sydney aren't in a good way but they passed that mantle onto St. Kilda on Sunday. Passion did take Sydney far on Sunday because they played exactly the way they have for the last 10 seasons of success; every player gave everything and played their part. Kirky (Brett) once told dad after Sydney won the 2005 flag that they were a team of "21 cloggers and a superstar (he was alluding to Barry Hall which may have been unfair on that Adam Goodes fella)". That strikes me as how they performed Sunday. St. Kilda now have a do or die against North Melbourne this week. They aren't in a good way and yet, this is where they've been before and often they have succeeded.


**  St. George continued on their losing ways, albeit this time with a good performance against a premiership contender but not good enough to stop the rot. As it stands they may need to win four finals in a row to repeat as premiers. Not impossible with the side they have, but highly unlikely. I will choose to take the NRL line in situations like this should we not be successful; "Thanks to Wayne for everything you've done for our club and we wish you and Darius all the best at Newcastle. We won't forget your contributions in a hurry. Well done St. Benny".


So in reality, the only two AFL games played on the weekend that could be considered swing games we contrived to tip incorrectly. I had a 3 tip lead in the competition at the Henty Bowling club, I've an anxious wait until Friday night to see how much damage has been inflicted. I have a sneaking suspicion the lead will only be 1. Then again, that certainly makes for an exciting couple of rounds. North or St. Kilda? North or St. Kilda? That's the one I'll agonise over all week.


And I'll be sure to let you know on Friday so you may tip the opposite way and get it right. Happy Monday!
Whitey

And the Cat's in the Cradle - 19/08/11

As I suggested on twitter today, I had a business partner opine that opening an pharmacy in a rural town of only 860 people may have been one of the worst business decisions one (me) could ever make.

Perhaps on that first, tragic day of 18 customers, he had a point. Today, when I barely had time to scratch myself for giving advice on diseases ranging from the cough of a common cold to how best to handle the four medications prescribed to deal with the nausea that will come with the chemotherapy, I'd done enough to prove that youth and inexperience don't necessarily mean you err. Hindsight is a wonderful thing however. Which is why we need to turn its judgemental eyes to the White men's decisions of last week

• St. Kilda pushed Collingwood. The footy world predicted it. Einsteins we are not. One from one, we move on
• It was Freo's Grand Final. FFS! How many Grand Finals have they competed in? Precisely. Please direct all abuse and witticisms at @Freo_Dockers (Fake Fremantle Dockers). You won't regret it. One from two.
• Henty's new medical centre. It won't be new, it will be the refurbishment I feared. It comes with the promise form the Greater Southern Area Health Service that there will always be a doctor in Henty (*Cough* Bullshit *Cough*) and that the the renovations will allow him to take on an intern to lessesn the load (lord please be truth). It also comes with a potential $300,000 State Government grant. I did know that, but that the person agitating for the new medical centre lied to the community about this fact did not help our cause. We may get the grant, we may not. So as of today, it's a wash. One and a half out of Three.
• This was just a statement about how proud dad was of his softball girls (Awwwwww...)

So a 50% record. We'd get a job for channel 7 as it stands.

Sadly, I hope you didn't come here for anything other than footy tonight. Because that's all the discussion circled around. So here we go...

**  There's Collingwood who will likely win the flag (60% chance). There's the biggest threat Geelong who are still outstanding and as hard as nails to boot (25%). There's Hawthorn who are playing exciting footy and could '08 it. (at 10pm of their premiership window they stole one and are at the 15% chance they were in '08). There's Carlton at 0% chance of winning the flag and a 20% chance of beating Hawthorn tonight (been and done, but we said this at 6:30pm). You heard it it here first and worst.

**  Sydney aren't in a good way right now. St. Kilda are. And it isn't at the SCG, it's at ANZ stadium. Sydney's loss to Richmond last weekend said nothing about the Tigers and everything about Sydney. They're not in a goo... Oh. I said that. We'll see.

**  Melbourne and Richmond is ridiculously tough to tip. But going out on the Fremantle limb (geez, didn't that work well), neither team is remotely good and Melbourne with all their turmoil will have set themselves for this. If they can't get up this week I would be massively concerned as a supporter. You lost your coach you didn't want to play for, your president that is your club icon and you love to death probably has several new stress related brain tumours (so you literally have loved him to death), and if you look at your draw, it's improbable but not impossible to make the final 8. To paraphrase Warrick Capper; "Richmond are as weak as piss, let's murder the bastards!".

**  No rethink at Collingwood? I've heard that Mick should only take so much credit and it's the assistants and the set up that deserve the praise. Bucks will fit in like, um,  a well fitting glove after back to back flags.

Bollocks. He's on a hiding to nothing. What's left after Mick leaves that sort of legacy? A club not willing to run through the brick wall for a flag, that's what. And don't give me this assistants and VFL staff bullshit. Who did the players run to embrace after they won last year? Mick Malthouse is the Wayne Bennett of the AFL, loved and respected by all the players. Good luck with that Bucks. Especially if Mick decides he has a point to prove to the Collingwood FC. And I don't doubt he will have. When he arrived, his claim was that he wanted to turn them into the Manchester United of the AFL. I laughed then. I don't now. He has done it, and the club is going to cast him aside as a "mentor". No they aren't, not if he doesn't want it. So many clubs in the AFL would take him on as coach in a heartbeat right now and that's where my money is. He'll stick it up Collingwood. Dad and I aren't betting against him. Too clever by half with your succession plan Magpies. But that's Eddie everywhere to a tee. Love your mates when you've got 'em, burn 'em when it's past time.

**  Speaking of St. George and Wayne Bennett, did he lose his team when he announced the Newcastle signing? If you're a Dragon through and through, do you want to run through the brick wall for him anymore? Pete says no and it's hard to argue. We were going to win another flag hands down. It's a shame it may end like this. You wouldn't put a red (and white) cent on the Dragons to win the flag anymore. And they should have.

So that's the week that was. Not a single Keno number. Three middies at the club. Hawthorn much better than the scoreline suggested, but likely not good enough to trouble the Magpies. But the beauty is in waiting and seeing. Which is what I get to do when Arsenal play Liverpool this week.

And for those that might get the joke that there's only one Denis Bergkamp well I say to you; there's only one Carl Jenkinson.

I failed the fitness test. I could only kick the footy 20 metres, not my normal range of 30. I don't get to play tomorrow, so I need another scotch. Down, down, down; down into my belly.

Stay cluey sports fans, you need to pick apart what the White's have got wrong. Cheers 'til then,

White Ox.

That'd make you Philthy, wouldn't it?

It's only ever happened once and it was reasonably distasteful. I was offered what I saw as a job offer I couldn't refuse, one that would allow me to go into business for myself and be closer to my girlfriend who had moved away. I wanted to take the job so, for the one and only time in my life, I had to tender a resignation. Only thing was, I wasn't sure how you did it.


So I tried to do the right thing. I called the Pharmacy Guild of Australia, asked what the proper protocol was and how much notice I was expected to give, and quietly prepared my letter for an amicable parting of the ways.


More fool me, or so I was to discover.


You see, the Pharmacy Guild is effectively a union for pharmacy owners to protect the interest of pharmacy owners. My $100 per year associate membership as an employee gave me access to advice on how to give proper notice. My employer's $2000 a year membership gave him access to a myriad of Guild staff only too happy to call him and tell him that Mark White intends to give notice of his resignation in the next couple of days.


The phone call I received from said employer that evening suggesting he'd have to cancel his family's skiing holiday to Canada as a result of the resignation I'd yet to give (which was absolute BULLSHIT in any case) left a very sour taste in my mouth. Fortunately this was during a time when pharmacists were in such ridiculously short supply there was no way he'd sack me; he needed those final two weeks and although I'd never take my job as a health professional as anything but serious, I may have let his staff know to watch for a dagger to be slipped into their back at any moment. It needn't have been handled this way, it could have been done amicably and maturely (and yes, I admit by the both of us although we have patched up our differences and get along much better now), but it wasn't.


Which is a lovely segue (gee I love that word) to the Phil Davis situation. I'll let @AdamCurley_Fox tell it to you as it is;


"Not sure why all the hysteria about Davis, anyone who thinks Suns didn't lock away blokes mid-season kidding themselves, deal with it #afl"


Too true, far too true. Philthy? You and me are guilty of one terrible, horrible thing. We were honest, up front and truthful with our employers. Much better we'd have remained silent, devious and waited the appropriate time to announce a contract we signed halfway through the season like the Gold Coast crew. Besides, it seems to have gotten you in the same position it got me; thanks for nothing.


It also got you something akin to a "I guess we'll have to cancel our end of season trip because we were waiting for your raffle money". Well, it did actually. It got you this from Adelaide FC's head of football operations' Stephen Harper courtesy of CEO Steven Trigg (who helped establish the rules under which the Suns and GWS operate by the way...);


"We were one of the clubs that agreed to the AFL concessions. Did we think we'd be the hardest hit of all the AFL clubs? Probably not, but as it turns out we are," 


"Our club is bloody disappointed Phil has made this decision. We understand it, but we don't like it". 


And then, in reward for his honesty and for fulfilling the obligations of his professional contract he signed with Adelaide when he was drafted, young Philthy was told to empty his locker, find his own physio to rehab his busted shoulder, and I would imagine to "piss off and never come back".


Boo hoo hoo Adelaide, you're breaking my heart. That Phil Ablett really made you the hardest hit of all AFL clubs, didn't they Stevie boy?


Where to from here? Somewhere I like to play a little game of compare, and contrast.


`Bryce (Gibbs) has been a great servant of (our club) for many years and we wish him and his family the very best for the future,’’


Do you hear that ladies and gents? It's the sound of every Carlton member frantically googling "Bryce Gibbs" to ensure he has not signed with Greater Western Sydney.


And he hasn't. Exhale Blue Baggers. That is a statement released by the NRL club Wests Tigers when one of their favourite sons, a premiership player in their sensational and  improbable run to the flag in 2005, signed a contract with the North Queensland Cowboys for the 2012 season and beyond. Despite the fact he will still be playing for the Tigers this year as they prepare for the finals. No ill will, no teammates turning their back on him or firing snide tweets at him, just a situation handled with great maturity and respect which largely is the norm for NRL clubs well used to these signings.


Adelaide Football Club has been held up for two decades as a model AFL club. Suddenly, they are being shown up as petty, immature and plain nasty in their handling of a similar signing to that which occurs in the NRL on a weekly basis from season to season. The NRL. The league that spawns Todd Carney. I tell you what, when the NRL can take the moral high ground over you, perhaps you need a little rethink about how you are handling your football club. The Crows would do well to listen and learn.


That said, there are issues within the system that allow the Suns and GWS to sign players that I am not comfortable with. And as per usual, there is a media personality who can articulate my thoughts far better than I. I give you the brilliant Emma Quayle (@emmsq);


"The Phil Davis GWS news is disgusting. Sickening that clubs weren't protected against losing players coming out of their first contract."


And that is where the collective rage of the footy world is, or should be, directed. Adelaide had just invested 3 years in Davis; is a first round pick in a tainted draft fair compensation? And my goodness, let us please not go anywhere near the Tom Scully situation at Melbourne. Whatever you think of the Demon's tanking tactics they do not deserve to lose that player before he has given them fair service. It is galling and from that point of view you can understand the club's and fans' anger.


There is a solution of course. The AFL could have chosen to look at other leagues with salary caps and how they handle their "first contract" players if you will. I'm a huge fan of NHL ice hockey and in that league such newly drafted players sign "entry level contracts", the completion of which occurs after 3 seasons of 10 games or more, and after that time they are considered "Restricted Free Agents". Restricted in that until halfway through the off-season, only their clubs may negotiate a new contract with them and even after that time limit has passed, other clubs may only tender an "offer sheet" of a contract to the player which the club who holds the Restricted player's rights may still choose to match. They hold the final decision as to whether they wish to keep the player or not. Adelaide should have been afforded this choice.


You would think the obvious flaw in this system is the opportunity for a club to throw a ridiculously overpriced contract at a restricted free agent. Not so, because the NHL has the foresight to deal with this problem as well. The NHL has drafted a policy whereby the higher the salary is offered to the free agent, the more draft picks must be given up by that club in compensation. Offer sheets are rare in the NHL world. Quality young players will give their club several good seasons.


If we were to use this analogy for the purposes of our AFL situation, should the Greater Western Sydney Franchise choose to offer Tom Scully a contract to the value of a million dollars per season, they would be forced by the league to give up three first round draft picks; their highest first round picks in drafts 2011, 2012, and 2013. There is no guarantee GWS will be successful in their first three seasons, all of these draft picks could be top 3 picks. Ask yourself two things; would the GWS still go after Scully so hard if this was the case? And should they do so, would Melbourne supporters be truly upset when they would be getting so much in return? I think we all know the answers to those questions.


Of course, anybody who follows the NHL knows there is a kicker; the spectre of Unrestricted Free Agency. The notion that after 7 years of continuous service with your club, or reaching the age of 26, you may sign with ANY other club in the league if you are out of contract with NO compensation to your previous club.


This is what makes Adelaide's reaction even more childish and disrespectful. The AFLPA and Matt Finnis want this kind of free agency. Do you think they won't get what they want? I doubt it. They may not get the percentage of league revenues as wages like they want in the current labour war, but they'll get a massive increase in pay. They may not get free agency exactly matching that of the NHL, but they will get a form of it. It is coming.


And when that happens, your Joel Selwoods, your Cyril Riolis, your Dustin Martins, and your Scott Pendleburys may see out their period of restricted free agency before signing for the highest bidder. Or, if their club has started to struggle and stagnate outside of the final 8, sign for the club that gives them a high chance of a premiership.


Fast forward five years. With their rebuilding of youth in full swing, could that club be Adelaide? Could they benefit from the system that is "bloody disappointing"? You bet they could.


I'm sorry to say it but the fabric of AFL football as we know it is going to change. The kind of loyalty we built our league upon is slowly being torn down, soon to be unrecognisable to us fans. One club players will become less the norm, more the rarity. It will take some getting used to by fans. Obviously it will, because the clubs can't get their head around it either. Adelaide don't seem to have the first idea as to why they have no right to be filthy with Phil.


But hold your head up Philthy, you've done nothing wrong. Nothing that others won't be doing now and beyond. Tip of the iceberg stuff. And no matter what happens, be proud that you are "Philthy" Phil Davis, honest as the day is long.


Of course, being filthy rich will likely soften the blow too. Greater We$tern $ydney? You bet. Stay classy everyone!
Whitey

And the Cat's in the Cradle - 12/08/11

Gaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!


Have I ever looked forward more to a beer? Well yes, equally as much. But I really, really, enjoyed it nonetheless. Remember good people, as a wise man once said (and was Re-Tweeted by Stephen Fry) "The best drink of the day is the one you have immediately before the first one". Think on it everyone!


So we've not quite been in the mood to put the world to rights as such. But we can do so the sporting world. So here goes...

• 5/8/11 "St. Kilda can beat Collingwood mate, they really CAN! People will think I'm mad but it's not as silly as you think..." 12/8/11 "The Saints can't win tonight, Collingwood will have too much depth and talent even though St. Kilda will run them closer than many believe" (Dad has been as St. Kilda supporter ever since he pulled on a Lavington Saints under 12s jumper as a little tacker when he was 8. The conversation invariably comes to them).

Caveat: I am aware the match started more than an hour ago and is being shown delayed on C7. Boo-urns C7, Boo-urns.

• And he has a point my ol' man. The shiteful, boring, "throw ten blokes behind the centre square" tactics that drag the game down give St. Kilda a chance in every game and... must be grudgingly respected. Ross Lyon has done an amazing job given the cattle he has; should this truly have been a three-times Grand-Finalist team that was a kinder bounce of the ball away from a famous premiership? He has always got the absolute best out of St. Kilda each and every season and has to be admired for that. They likely won't win tonight, but they will show why no team wants to get them in the first week of finals.

• This weekend is Fremantle's Grand Final. Yes, we are like you, we are that hackneyed and cliched. But it's true, they must beat Carlton to keep their finals hopes alive, and they are a very big chance of that due to the inclusion of Aaron Sandilands. Even if he's only half fit. Have you ever played in a team where one player made a, erm, mountain of difference? Gave you belief that you could win the game? When I first played football for the Rand Footy Club they were in crisis. Players had left en masse resulting in three consecutive bottom 2 finishes. And then they recruited a single playing coach. One player. A centre half forward. And in the second match of the season, we defeated a league powerhouse that we had never got within 15 goals of before. We believed. We believed because Knackers was there to contest, to stand in our corner, to take the key mark and kick the vital goal to get us over the line. And we lifted accordingly. Suddenly, we played in two consecutive preliminary finals. It was the footy time of my life, memories I'll never forget; a bunch of amateur shit-kickers who stuck it up plenty of the big clubs. And that's where Freo are at. Sandi can be half fit but just his presence, just the idea that he will contest could inspire his teammates to better things. I'd be concerned if I were Carlton. Their top 4 dreams could die this weekend.

• I have to tread on toes this week, I just have to. No, we're off the footy field now, I have to upset and antagonise people I admire and respect. I have to do it because they are about to make a massive mistake in this community. They are about to use a federal government grant to renovate the existing Doctor's surgery into something moderately better as opposed to accepting land donated to them by the Henty Financial Community Services to build a brand new state of the art Medical centre able to cater for several doctors and other health professionals. And believe me, with two doctors in small towns in the shire far and beyond retirement age, state and federal government will not look to replace them in those towns. They will want to centralise the healthcare in the area and if you, as a government, had to choose between a minor upgrade to a dilapidated old building and a brand new state of the art, already paid for medical centre, what do you believe they will choose. If it's the former, they'll choose to build a brand new medical centre and it won't be in Henty and all of a sudden, not only will you not have a doctor in Henty, you won't have a pharmacy. Because unbeknownst to the community, my pharmacy approval unlike many others is moveable. I could shift premises to Melbourne if I so desired, granted I abided by location laws. Or worse, as because I love the community of Henty so much and would never do that to them, I could sell my business to someone who might. Those short-sighted people whose agendas are only for themselves and not the community with the current renovation proposal need to learn this. Should they choose to stay stubborn, I fear for healthcare in this community.

• Dad has finally had his Lavington Public School state knockout softball team eliminated. They played in the Riverina final against a school who had the state representative pitcher and state representative catcher. Ouch. The mood amongst his girls before the game was one of resignation to defeat until he asked them to consider nothing other than that they were going to win the game. The apprehension was palpable however. Being sent in to bat first, it was blatantly obvious they were not going to score a run. Their pitcher would've made Geoff Thomson  blush and they had a catcher that made Ian Healy look like his gloves were made of iron. But dad's not one to be defeatist. "So you can't score a run girls, that doesn't mean you can't field well and I'm sure you will!". And, as he so often is, he was right. In a three innings game, the girls kept a potential state champion to innings of 2, 3 and ZERO runs. A 5-0 loss when he feared a 30-0 loss. Dad lives for these days, proud as anything of his girls. But then, I still feel you only play well if you are happy and relaxed with your coach. Melbourne Football Club could do far worse than to give Peter White a call.

So that was our evening, we couldn't fix the rioting in England or the crash of the stock market. But then, us White's are men, and as such we are only capable of doing one thing at a time. We'll tackle these issues next week, after someone else has fixed them, or they've managed to fade into insignificance in the face of the latest scandal. Ain't it the truth.

So I jumped in the car, said my goodbyes and my see ya tomorrows to which dad replied "no worries, I'll be down there to watch you play". I did have to ask him if he really wanted to waste his time watching me run around getting nowhere near the footy to which he replied "of course, I love watching you play".

Dads. I guess I'll get to watch my boy through a father's eyes one day. I only hope I lift his spirits as much as Pete lifts mine.

Have a lovely weekend everyone, may everyone kick a goal,

Whitey.

And the Cat's in the Cradle - Prelude

I heard there was a bit of a furore lately when some journalist used her morning TV segment to decry this bloke who had just won some sort of bike race as something less than a hero. I'll let you guys decide what you think of that.


Heroes come in all guises of course. They inspire us to do great things and to be better people. So if you're going to have one, it's probably a really, really good thing when they are close to you and you can speak to them often.


My hero captained his cricket club to 5 premierships. He played in a plethora of representative football teams. He was charismatic, friendly and kind, and if he saw injustice he'd actively try to do something about it. He was the primary school teacher who the kids genuinely wanted to have teach them; although it may have helped that he had them outside for P.E. sport 3 hours a day!


He taught me how to hold the bat, how to kick the footy, what the capital of Ecuador was and most importantly, had a stern word for when I'd erred and a way of reigning me in when I was starting to think I was more important than I really was. He became a figure of utmost respect... "You know I'm gonna be like him yeah, you know I'm gonna be like him..."


But I've learnt that your dad shouldn't be your hero. And as much as you might want to be just like him, it's your differences that define how you stack up against each other, not your similarities (and believe me, we are nigh on identical!).


So for that reason, I'm bloody glad dad isn't my hero anymore. It's much better that he's one of my best mates.

Front Page of the Border Mail, 1983. The Old Man has just led Lavington CC to their third consecutive premiership. The only 3 they'd ever won. Three year old me is suitably chuffed.

I never did manage to play the booming pull shot off the lightening quick bowlers that was dad's trademark, try as he might to teach me. Sadly he was working with inferior clay. However the lesson never should be about how well you play, rather developing a love for the game, respect for your opposition and commitment to your teammates. He taught me these things well as, after all, he has taught me everything I know about sport.


And this is what makes Friday nights so special to me. For as long as I can remember (and have been legal), Friday has been a trip to the club to put on the footy tips, a $20 donation to the coffers of Club Keno, and a discussion about how to right all the wrongs in the world. Not just the ills of the AFL and its clubs or the Australian Cricket team and its captains, but also how to fix all that is wrong with the world. Right the wrongs of the previous inept governments be they ALP or Coalition. Concoct the ideas that would purge the world of hunger and disease. Fix the education (dad) and healthcare (me) system's problems that are so glaringly obvious and so easily rectified that Australia could really be on solid footing again. This is what we do every Friday night; if only we were in charge we'd have this ship sailing smoothly in no time.


So this will be the new, weekly Friday night blog post; "The Cat's in the Cradle". We'll have our father-son quality time to opine on the good and bad, prognosticate on future happenings like whether or not Jack Watts will fulfil his potential or Phil Hughes will ever learn to play the short ball, and it will be posted here in austerity for us to self congratulate ourselves for being correct 100% of the time.


Except of course when we are not, and I expect my readership to remind me at every opportunity too. It's your duty as fellow "know-it-alls" to tell us just how wrong we are. Although I am sure of one thing with great certainty; if every father cared enough to take their son for a couple of beers and a round of Keno each week, the world would be a far better place for it.


And I'm a much better person for it. I don't even have to be a hero.


Stay well good people,
Whitey

I'm not Planking, I'm just killing time...

Ruined. Ruined I tells ya.


That wonderful, magical photo of me in my element. In my happy place. The one that brings back memories of the ripper 24th birthday party of my beloved then girlfriend, and now wife, the beautiful @White_Wig (It's been nine years together now, there's every chance this could work!).

The Henty Cricket Widows Club, the lovely El, the light of my life @White_Wig, and the gorgeous Aimz. I love ya all!

The photo in question is the one that adorns the background of this very blog. That constituted my twitter avatar for a handful of hours. Until the unimaginable happened. The @ mentions came flooding in and they wanted to know one thing and one thing only. A question so prime evil I had to take my profile picture down there and then because of the implied ridicule. I was being accused of the most heinous crime a purportedly intelligent person could possibly commit.


"Nice one Whitey, is that you PLANKING???"


Well, if I was, then I was ahead of my time. Innovative. A pioneer. I blazed the planking trail in March of 2008 and recently the phenomenon has become a worldwide smash hit. No need to thank me, it was just me doin' my thang.


Or not. You see, it's not entirely difficult for big and burly mates to decide at any given party that they want to pick up Whitey and put him on a freezer. It tends to be one of the occupational hazards of only being five foot eight tall, and weighing 70 kilos when soaking wet. I've been put on roofs. I've been put on bookshelves. On extreme(ly drunk) occasions, I've been known to be the ball in a game called "Catch a Whitey", a game in which participants take turns throwing and catching me in ever more hilarious ways until somebody gets hurt. It's not a game for the faint of heart, or for the person who is the ball...


And in amongst this I've learnt one thing; to swim with the current and to go with the flow. If a freezer is where I'm deemed to belong, then I belong on a freezer. With a can of Scotch. And a sharp tongue, directed at my assailants. You want a piece of the Ox? You can have the whole damn thing. Just look at me; cheeky grin, hurling witty barbs. Sticks and stones may break my bones but freezers ever girt me.


Yeah alright. Maybe I overrate myself in the puns department. After all, I never am a sledger when I play cricket.


Oh yeah, cricket. So maybe me on a fridge isn't my finest moment after all. Who'd have thought it? But if you take a quick look at my profile picture on this blog you may just find one of my true favourite photos ever. Another one that I have to owe to @White_Wig as she's managed to encapsulate the joy, the relief, and most of all, the offering of a handshake in thanks. Thanks to the Henty Cricket Club for allowing me to be its captain. Thanks to my teammates for a remarkable comeback win when we truly were all but beaten. Thanks for humbling me by giving me the opportunity to be, at the time, only the third premiership captain in Henty's 50 year history. And thanks to the pictured Henty Cricket Widows Club. You give up your blokes on a Saturday so they can chase a red ball whilst wearing white pyjamas with nary a complaint. And why would you after the third champagne? By then you girls are usually ready for a nap in the sun.


Some might even call it planking...

Henty and District Cricket Club, A Grade Premiers Season 2006-07

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

* I realise that I promised a blog on more serious matters for my second effort but scant little is more serious than the welfare of those caught in the sheer madness of the London riots. Kristel's (@White_Wig) brother and his girlfriend have been living in London for the past 12 months and we awoke to terror from what we were reading about and witnessing this morning Australian time. Thankfully both are quite safe and for that we are very grateful. It is for this reason I decided that a healthy dose of self deprecation was required in today's post to hopefully give everyone a good laugh (little giggle? slight smirk?) and take their attention away from those finding humour in telling jokes about the riots. Forgive me if I fail to see the funny side.


Like I always say, stay well everyone. Especially today.
Whitey

Whatever happens, please don't run out of shoes Gaz. Please?

It's the Saturday night after the game, a damp squib for all except the Cats faithful who were quite happy to see their side put on a football clinic as only they can. And yet, they may have been the slightest bit disappointed because the true event that was to define the day was denied to us all and weren't we all atwitter about it.


Yes I'm sorry, that is the pun. But truly, the word "atwitter" did exist before a popular social media website. Look it up! Yet I digress...


Personally I found it quite disappointing that Ablett was unable to play. On the whole the Geelong supporters I know or have read feedback from on twitter have been fantastic; they respect Gary for everything he achieved with and for the club and would have given him a warm reception indeed.


And I can understand it. I can say hand on heart that if my beloved Buddy Franklin or Luke Hodge signed with Greater Western Sydney tomorrow then I can assure you the first thing I would do would be to scour the draw to find the first match they played against Hawthorn so that I could get the best seats possible to applaud them and congratulate them for everything they've done for the Hawthorn Football Club. They would lose no respect in my eyes whatsoever.


There are those, however, who have a different perspective on these situations. So with this in mind I must share this letter written to my local newspaper, Albury/Wodonga's award winning Border Morning Mail, by a family less than pleased with little Gaz's new career choice. I have chosen not to divulge their names (and believe me, they were more than happy to put their names to this) so that there may be no repercussions;


"GARY, please don’t insult us any more.

There were plenty of challenges for you at Geelong, perhaps you could look at Leigh Matthews, Jonathon Brown, James Hird, Dustin Fletcher or Arch for examples.

Instead you chose to look at the “challenges” that faced Greg Williams at Carlton, Geelong, Sydney and Carlton again.

Simple, both Pickering and you like Lebron went for the cash.

You sold out.

To hell with the club that has nurtured you and your family.

I know that people change employers all the time to hope to better their lives but football should be different and is different.

Don’t we want it to be tribal.

Gary, how many pairs of shoes do you want?

How many cars, investment properties, swimming pools, flat screen TVs?

When will you have enough?

We can understand Pickering but you!

We’re gutted, Geelong players may put a spin on it but they would be totally gutted as well.

We were naive.

We ignored the media hoping and thinking you would put the team and teammates first.

You only had to do it for another 2000 well-paid days, probably ending your career as the most decorated Geelong player of all time.

The greatest.

You more than likely will do well at the Gold Coast but you will be remembered as the ex-Geelong player who sold out.

Does anyone really believe that this is for the better?

It just inflates the cost of football quicker while promoting greed and disloyalty.

Geelong has been a model club.

Loyal to its coach and players such as Egan, Stokes, N. Ablett, Lonegan, while providing opportunities for Mumford and Prismall.

This loyalty will probably delay future success but they make us proud.

We do not look forward to more advertising on the jumpers and the coaches shirts.

We do not look forward to more ads during the telecast.

We do not look forward to more name changes to stadiums.

We will protest the only way we can by not attending games.

Perhaps our fellow Geelong supporters could protest as well.

As John Kennedy says “do something”.

When attending the Geelong, Gold Coast retirees game just turn your backs.

Don’t boo him that is predictable and tacky. Just silence. Doesn’t make for good television that.

We’re bitter, that is obvious but to all other supporters out there it could be Sandilands, Goodes, Goddard or Swan next to Western Sydney.

Someone will be sitting beside the new coach in the new shirt, clapping each other on the shoulder like the oldest of mates, smiling like a burst watermelon, saying what a difficult decision it was but I needed the challenge.

Yes, Gary, we’ll explain that to the kids who have your picture on the wall, you left Geelong because you needed a challenge."


Well, well. Pretty ribald stuff don't you think?


Unfortunately one of my curses in life is a long memory so this was the first thing that came to my mind when I heard the news Gary would not be playing was this letter. And to twitter I retorted:


"Feel sorry for the family that wrote the letter to the @bordermail in October. Now they can't turn their back on Gaz at Skilled. #Tossers"


I believe there's some sort of idiom about not passing judgement until you walk a mile in a man's shoes. All I can say is you'd want to walk it mighty quick given the half marathon Gaz covers in every game he plays. However, with this in mind, I will agree with some of the things written in the letter.

I believe, that from his salary at Geelong let alone the Suns, Gary has as many cars as he would like.


He would have enough investment properties.


He would have enough flat screen TVs, swimming pools, and dollars in the bank.


And fortunately, given the rate he would wear through them at 20km a game, Gary would have enough shoes.


What he would not have enough of, nor probably any of if you took the moment to walk in his many shoes, is anonymity. Do you think that Gary Ablett could possibly walk down the main street of Geelong without being asked for an autograph several times a day? Without being asked for a photo? Could he eat a meal in a restaurant without many sets of eyes on him? I can't imagine he wouldn't have been interrupted in the middle of a meal with such a request from time to time.


And when we consider how much his father shunned the spotlight. When we consider how hard he tried to shelter his children from the media glare, an attention that both Nathan and Gary tried to avoid at all costs themselves when playing their junior football, we can understand what the Gold Coast could offer Gary that Geelong never would be able to. Relative anonymity. 


Fame, with its perks, has its drawbacks too. I for one could not handle that intrusion of privacy. That Gaz did for so long, well, he's a better person than me.


So what exactly am I trying to say? Little more than I did at the start of this post; Geelong fans should feel blessed to have had Gaz when they did and they should be incredibly appreciative to have had such a wonderful player and person represent their club so much and so well. And they should understand that he did not take the money and run. We've all been told that money isn't everything in life and whilst Gary would have more than most of us could ever hope to earn, I don't think his sojourn to the Gold Coast is about greater earning power neither is it about breaking loyalties. I believe if you give 100% in every game you play for your football club then that is how you define loyalty. Gary Ablett Jnr has it in spades and should be respected as such.


There were other points raised in the letter that were completely emotional and ridiculously illogical and if I had the time I'd belittle those too but it's time to come down from my fridge shaped soapbox for my first time. Yet make no mistake; the signings that the GCS and GWS are making that are changing the fabric of the game as we know it are merely the tip of the iceberg and not the major concern. Free agency is coming, the ramifications of which will not be pretty.


It's a great segue to my next post to come, the Phil Davis situation. It shouldn't surprise you that I'll be fighting in his corner too, the poor bloke needs a few mates at the moment because he's short a few and I'm not sure he deserves that.


Until then, this is White Ox stepping off his soapbox. I must, as I have developed an inexplicable urge to go and purchase some shoes.


Stay well everyone,

Whitey